Today, emotion hit me like no other day. It doesn’t quite make sense, and it couldn’t rationalize it, but the entire day I was tired, slow, and off. I didn’t feel ready or about to cry, but I completely popped about 15 minutes ago.
I don’t think it’s Valentine’s Day related, maybe it’s just today.
Yesterday I posted on my Instagram that I didn’t care about Valentine’s Day, and I still really don’t, but I made the conscious effort not to spend too much time on Instagram today. I put my intention towards my kid, I bought her a present and balloons to tell her she’s my valentine, and for the most part I ignored the day.
But Facebook didn’t let me ignore a memory from 7 years ago when I was in a happier place. He reminded me of a photo of an ex-boyfriend and I, a screenshot through Skype. Facebook didn’t know I really missed him and that often I think about our relationship and see him as the one person that really loved me for me. Facebook also doesn’t know that he has me blocked, so this memory of us he will never see. I know I can block those too – that I’m in a place right now where I’m choosing to feel my emotions.
So I don’t know. I don’t know if I can connect the emotions of today to the fact that it’s Valentine’s Day, or that it just today, but I’m feeling it, and I’m feeling it pretty strong.
If you’re feeling it as well today – I hope you find a way to get some peace and work through the tough feelings. If you need a helping hand my email is always open: jessica@jessicaknightcoaching.com.
